Lost!

I hate losing stuff!  I think I lost my debit card.  I may not have lost it.  It might just be misplaced or it might be out for a stroll or it might just be mad at me and be hiding someplace.  OK, I guess all of those are kind of denying the obvious.

I guess by not saying “I lost it,”  I can somehow deflect responsibility.  I don’t have to own the fact that I blew it, that I screwed up somehow.  I hate admitting that I lost it.

When I lose something, I feel so irresponsible.  I beat myself up a bit.  I should have been more careful.  I should have paid attention.  I shouldn’t have been so careless.  I have a whole bunch of “should ofs” or “shouldn’t haves.”

But, I guess if I would just admit I made a mistake quickly, I could begin to deal with the loss and get back to living.  I could eliminate a whole lot of avoidance and shame issues.

So, let’s give this whole honest admission a chance.  My name is Jim and I sometimes lose stuff… or maybe, I just misplace things.  I will keep trying!

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