There are days that I grow tired of being a pastor. It’s not that I am ready to throw in the towel or anything. I just realize again how difficult it can be to deal with the problems that people face. I mean its tough sometime trying to help folks through life stuff.
So, I am sitting here tonight bone weary. I enjoy working with people but I don’t like it when I can’t fix it all. It goes against this thing in my head that says I need to be able to set it all right.
The issues often revolve around relationships. Couples struggling with broken trust, mothers and daughters with huge communication rifts, friends violating boundaries with each other, and much more.
Then, you add to these situations, people dealing with family health problems or weighted down by financial burdens or addictions and you have some heavy loads.
As a guy working with folks through these life challenges, it begins to stick to you. You can’t shake it that easily. You sometimes stay up late at night trying to figure out how you can help and pouring your heart out to God.
I have been reading a Blog the last month or so by a young mother who is dealing with one of her children, her youngest, going through cancer treatments. The rawness of her writing and the transparency of her sharing has humbled me.
When I look at the picture of this little guy fighting for his life, I can’t help but be reminded of how insignificant some of my complaints are.
In fact, what really wears me down even more than these tough things people face are the folks that complain about seemingly nothing kinds of things. We as people can sometimes let the littlest things throw us off. We really are pretty self centered.
In spite of all of this, both the huge problems people face that are so unfair and the little things that people blow out of proportion, I guess I will go to work tomorrow. Regardless of how I might feel right now, God wants to use me. I don’t always have to like it. I just have to be obedient.
Someone once told someone going into pastoral ministry, “if you can do anything else, do it.” But, if God calls you, you are stuck. Come hell or high water, I am ready to start all over tomorrow!